Noticing the new life all around us.
How I spent an afternoon watching someone, watch birds ...
Last week I spent a quick 24 hours back in Boerne at the monastery1. This is the third year in a row that i’ve spent the days following Easter in this quiet place. Shortly after I arrived I headed out to the back porch of the retreat house to feel the cool breeze and look out into the hill country.
While sitting on the porch, I noticed a man walking around the St. Francis of Assisi Chapel — essentially an outdoor chapel with stone benches and a large table and cross. I watched him walk around for a bit, like he was looking for something. And then curiously, I noticed him brushing pollen off a bench and eventually bending down to blow it off — I thought maybe some words were engraved on the concrete and he was trying to read them. But (in a surprising turn of events) after a few minutes of this, he sat down!
He sat for a while watching the sky. I made note that he didn’t sit down and pull out a phone to take a picture or check his messages, he just sat, and when I thought he was reaching into his pocket for a phone, he pulled out… binoculars! I watched him a bit longer as he looked into the distance, and breathed in the hill country air.
As I watched this scene unfold I had a book of Naomi Shihab Nye’s poems2 in my lap. As the man searched the sky with his binoculars, I read her poem, Red Brocade3, she writes:
No, I was not busy when you came!
I was not preparing to be busy.
That’s the armor everyone put on
to pretend they had a purpose
in the world.
I refused to be claimed.
I wondered about this man, taking his time to thoroughly wipe off a bench, watching the birds first with his own eyes, then adding the help of binoculars. I don’t think he’s claimed by the need to act busy, to pretend he has purpose. Not because he doesn’t have purpose — but because he does — no matter what the world might say about a person with time on a Monday afternoon to wipe off a bench and watch the birds. (Not to mention what the world might say about a person who has time on a Monday afternoon to watch a person watch birds — but let’s not think too hard about that one.)
When I first read Nye’s poem, I thought — I’m not putting on armor! I am busy! I have finals, and sermons to write. I have a book fair to volunteer at and a whole full life!
I sent a message to a friend this week asking — how do you know if you have too much going on or if you just have a full life? One thought she had was to intentionally pause — maybe at the end of a busy season, or, I wondered, maybe right in the middle.
I had gone straight to Nye’s line about armor — instead of her line about refusing to be claimed. As I sat there reading poetry, watching the man watch birds, I didn’t even acknowledge that in my own choice for slowness I had refused to be claimed.
I don’t always have time (space, money, childcare etc.) for a 24 hour retreat, but I do have time for a few deep breaths before I start the car. I have time to look out the window at my bird feeder, to linger a bit longer at dinner with my family, or to say a prayer for a friend. I have time for a neighborhood walk where I can notice new life brought by sun and spring rains.
Every Easter I return to this quote from Traci Smith: To notice resurrection in the everyday is to be in tune with the greatest truth of the Christian faith: death is not ultimately victorious. There is always hope. There is new life all around.
And so we find ourselves here, a week into Eastertide, and likely one of the busiest times of the year for you (and me!). I want to encourage you that this season in the church is 50 days, not just one Sunday morning — we have not missed our chance to notice resurrection all around us. We like the man at the monastery can dust off a bench, pull out our binoculars and refuse to be claimed by our busyness. Resurrection invites us to notice the new life all around us.
alongside you in your efforts to not be claimed,
Holly
Spiritual Direction News & Updates
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This summer I’m hosting a spiritual direction group for clergy & ministry leaders. I’d love for you to join us! For more information or to register, follow this link.
I’m hosting a virtual Eastertide Mini-retreat on May 6th from 7:30 pm to 9 pm CT and May 7 from 12 pm to 1:30 pm CT. You can find more information here, and register here. I’d love for you to join!
Everything Comes Next Collected & New Poems, Naomi Shihab Nye