For the last several years, I’ve participated in the New Year’s ritual of choosing a word for the year. Before that, I often made a huge list of resolutions or goals, some that I kept and some that I didn’t. I have found the practice of choosing a word for the year to be much more life-giving and far less disappointing.
In recent years I’ve chosen words like receive and play, and this year I was settling in on the word nurture. It seemed like the perfect word to capture how I want to take care of myself, as well as my family, work, and community.
I never felt entirely settled on the word nurture and kept coming back to continue. I thought about the changes I’d experienced — new babies, job changes, school transitions, and outside factors like the pandemic. I hadn’t seen before the amount of change I’d been through, each year looking different.
I recognized that this one would likely be sort of the same as last year, and I began to hear the word continue as a real possibility. I was resistant at first. The word seemed boring and stagnant, but as I considered how it’s used, I saw something different.
My GPS app says to “continue for 4 miles,” a recipe might say: “continue to sauté the onions until they’re golden brown,” and as a parent, I have been known to say, “if you continue to talk to your sister that way…” — I suddenly couldn’t stop seeing the movement in the word. When I dug further, I found the definition for continue to be: “persist in an activity or process.”
In my reflections on the year before, I realized that I want more or less to tend to my life rather than experience a total upheaval. That as a family, we’d made time for work, rest, and play, not perfectly or every day, but I have practices set in place for the kind of family life that I desire. In my work, I have found rhythms that are (mostly) sustainable. And in my relationship with God, I’ve found practices that draw me in and give me life. Again, nothing is perfect or completely settled; but I realize that in so many areas of my life, I simply want to continue. I want to tend to what already is.
What I hope to offer is a chance for you to reflect and think through what you want to continue this year in regard to your life with God (which, of course, is really just your life). So often, we think about what we are not doing and how we can better ourselves and make big changes. So I thought today, we could spend time building on what already is.
Emily P. Freeman has a practice where she reflects on what worked and didn’t from the previous year. (You can listen to her podcast on what worked for her here). While I think it’s beneficial to reflect on both, for today, let’s stick to what worked (since we likely don’t want to continue with what didn’t).
Take a few quiet minutes to make a list of 5-10 things that worked this year and practices you want to continue. You might add something big, like the time you gave to your spiritual community or friendships. Or it might be something small like a breath prayer that you say as you get into the car for school drop-off. There are no right or wrong answers here; just make a list of what is working.
Now look over your list and decide on a few practices that you want to continue but might need some tending. Maybe family dinners are consistent, but you want to open with prayer or highs and lows more often (me!). Or perhaps you read a lot last year but want to incorporate more reflective reading or prayer books.
Once you’ve identified a few, make a list of one or two steps you might take in order to tend to these practices. In what ways do you want to continue?
If it’s something you can do right now, do it — write down a breath prayer on a notecard and tape it to your bathroom mirror. Or make a plan to see a friend for a walk and discuss what’s working in your spiritual life right now.
If it’s something that needs to be done later, put your list where you can see it or add the next steps to your to-do list or planner. Do whatever you need to do to take the step to tend to your life.
Finally, give yourself a few more minutes of quiet to read over your list and ask God to join you as you tend to the things in your life you want to continue.
I hope you’ll carry this practice of naming, tending, and continuing—into other parts of your life. It can be easy only to see the changes we need to make and forget about what is already working, but here is your invitation to tend to what already is.
May you find grace and peace in your day,
Holly
Simply Continue
Creator of ordinary days,
of the mundane and next steps that we just call life.
Be near us as we simply continue —
in curiosity,
in gratitude,
in love.
Amen
A few things:
I pre-ordered the new K.J. Ramsey book: The Book of Common Courage: Prayers and Poems to find Strength in Small Moments, and it came this week. I’ve only just started it, but I recommend it already!
Anam Cara, where I am a spiritual direction apprentice, is hosting a Retreat In Daily Life at the end of February / early March. A Retreat in Daily Life is a week-long opportunity for busy people to find spiritual rest and renewal in their daily schedule. You can find more information on the Anam Cara website here.
One way I am continuing this year is through my apprenticeship with Anam Cara. As a spiritual direction apprentice, I am taking on directees for free as I learn and grow in the practice. If you know anyone who might be interested, would you send them my way? You can read more about my apprenticeship training here and see my bio at the bottom of this page. If you know someone who might be interested, they can contact me at: hollyporterphillips@gmail.com.