Before we move completely into the next season, I invite you to settle into the in-between space. While the leftovers are still in your fridge, let’s linger in gratitude a little longer before we move on to hope, peace, joy, and love.
In the intention-setting mini-retreat I’m leading next week, we’ll be using The Prayer of Examen to center ourselves amongst the busyness of December.
The second step of the Examen is to review the day in thanksgiving - and I want to rest here for a bit. Today, we’ll settle into a posture of gratitude as we move into Advent & Christmas. At the retreat I attended earlier in the month, our guide, Aaron Niequist, led us through The Prayer of Examen — he reminded us that this step is not a time to “count your blessings,” but rather a time to savor your blessings.
The Oxford Dictionary says that to savor is to taste (good food or drink) and enjoy it completely. So, how might we savor our blessings? How might we look at the good things in our lives and enjoy them completely?
Throughout Advent, we’ll make room here for lament, grief, and sadness. We’ll push back on the traditional Advent themes; we’ll consider our culture and how it asks us to be merry during the longest, darkest nights of the year. I wonder, for today, what would it look like to begin this season in gratitude? And not simply jotting down a few good things from our year — but savoring in the goodness of our lives.
In Brené Brown’s research on joy and gratitude, she tells us that over and over, the people who expressed experiencing the most joy had not just a spirit of gratitude, but engaged in practices of gratitude. If you’d like to stick with me a bit longer (10ish minutes or however long or short you make it!), I’d love to invite you into steps 1 and 2 of the Prayer of Examen as we practice gratitude together:
Begin by closing your eyes, or find a gentle place to rest your gaze. Take a few deep breaths— breathing in God’s goodness and breathing out all that is not of God (fear, anxiety, anger, envy).
Pray: God, help me see my life with clarity. Show me your goodness, even amidst the backdrop of grief. (Replace grief with any word that makes sense for you — sadness, stress, anxiety, fear). Linger here in silent prayer.
Take three more deep breaths — breathing in God’s goodness and breathing out all that is not of God. (Return to this prayer anytime you need to during the practice — when your inner critic shows up, when you start making a to-do list for next week, or when you are interrupted).
Review the last few days/weeks or year with gratitude. (Any amount of time works here). Create a list of as many things as you can think of that you feel grateful for (perhaps staying here for 5-10 minutes). When you feel like you’ve completed your list, dig in and push yourself to add just a few more.
Circle 2-3 things on your list that you’d like to savor today. (You can return to your list and savor the goodness anytime!)
Pray: God, deepen my gratitude and show me how to enjoy these good gifts completely. Teach me to savor the goodness of my life.
Prayerfully read through each item you circled. You might imagine the moment, write down a few more thoughts about it, or even write a note to share your gratitude with someone else. Stay here as long as you’d like.
Finally, return to your deep breathing — breathing in God’s goodness and breathing out all that is not of God.
At the upcoming mini-retreat, we’ll walk through all five steps of The Prayer of Examen, but for today, let’s stop here — savoring and deeply enjoying the goodness in our lives.
Thank you for joining me in this practice today.
Links & Spiritual Direction News
On November 30th, I’m offering a virtual Preparing to Wait mini-retreat from 7:30-9pm CT. It will be a spacious time to prayerfully consider how you would like to enter the Advent season. The Preparing to Wait mini-retreat will be donation-based for those who are able, but otherwise free. If you would like to attend, please email me at hollyporterphillips@gmail.com and I will add you to the list to receive more information and the Zoom link. If you are unable to attend but are interested in the material, send me an email, and I will send you self-guided materials after November 30th. This event is open to anyone, so please feel free to share.
As a spiritual direction apprentice, I am taking on directees (both in person and virtually) for free as I learn and grow in the practice. You can read more about my apprenticeship training here, see my bio at the bottom of this page and read a little about my philosophy of spiritual direction here. If spiritual direction is something that you or someone you know might be interested in, please reach out! I can be contacted at hollyporterphillips@gmail.com.
Last week, I included a few resources for Advent & Christmas — if you missed them, you can find the list here.