Last week I presented a final project for my spiritual direction apprenticeship and training. I’ve witnessed many projects during my time with Anam Cara1 — apprentices have chosen topics like embodiment, grief, ADHD, and silence. Each project has brought me new understanding and awareness to the role of spiritual director. Sometimes projects are about the spiritual life of the director or about the logistics of listening and tools a director might use. And sometimes, as with my topic, it's about making the work sustainable. If you read this Substack with any regularity, you’ll not be surprised that I chose to do my project on play2. Toward the end of my presentation, I offered a few reflection questions, including: What would it look like to treat play as a spiritual practice?
As a pastor and spiritual director (as a person?) I have plenty of time to be serious. My days often revolve around forming a sermon or essay, listening to stories of heartache and grief, responding to email and checking to see if we need more milk.
What I don’t always have time for, or make time for is play. As I said above, I’ve written on this topic several times in the last year — not because I have it all figured out, but because it’s a posture that I’m moving in to. I’m learning to be playful and to look for delight.
What it comes down to, is that as created beings we cannot ignore that play is in us. I believe I was created, in part, to play — to laugh, make jokes, play games, and enjoy my life. It’s impossible for us to hold the heaviness of life — to look at it directly all day every day without taking a break. I am believing more and more all the time that in order to not turn away from the pain and suffering in our lives and in the world, we must hold it alongside the lighter parts of life. In order to grieve, to participate in works of justice, to unlearn and relearn we must also give our time to rest3 and play.
Cole Arthur Riley4 writes this: There are those of us who are such serious people that to be playful feels foolish, and maybe it is. But I think when we give ourselves to play, the scope of our life expands. We become freer in our bodies. We give ourselves to imagination and make-believe. This takes down our defenses and allows us to move and be without expectation of immediate tragedy.
Today’s invitation to you is not to turn away from whatever it is you are carrying, but to remember to play. To hold the heaviness of the world, the groaning, the heartache in one hand and (I don’t know) a disco ball in the other.
So today, I hope you’ll ask yourself. What would it look like to treat play as a spiritual practice? What would it look like to schedule in time to do something for the sake of itself — for me i’m roller skating, reading books for pure enjoyment5, coaching volleyball, playing games6 and watching funny clips on Instagram with my family. How will you delight in being created to play?
Links & Spiritual Direction News
I am excited be joining Charlotte Donlon with her work at Spiritual Direction for Writers. I’ll be leading a few co-writing sessions in April and May! If you’d like to join in, you can find more information here.
In May, I’ll be attending the Pastors, Priests and Guides retreat in Chicago — enjoying the retreat and sitting with a few attendees in spiritual direction. I will also be offering spiritual direction groups following the retreat. (If you’re planning to attend and have interest in joining one of these groups please reach out!)
I currently have space available for new directees. If spiritual direction is something that you or someone you know might be interested in, please reach out — hollyporterphillips@gmail.com. I’ve written here a little about what spiritual direction is to me, if you’d like to know more!
Anam Cara has become a beloved community of friends and mentors. I can’t say enough good things about my experience as an apprentice.
Rest is a topic that is growing in importance for me, so get ready for some chatter about rest.
From This Here Flesh by Cole Arthur Riley
I’m loving Kate Kennedy’s One in a Millennial right now!
A few games we’re enjoying as a family (with our older kids - aged 9 and 12) that keep us laughing: Cards Against Humanity (Family Edition), Ransom Notes (I had to take a few cards out, but overall easy to make family friendly) and Quiplash from Jackbox (a computer game). If you have games you’d add to this list, please leave your favorites below in the comments as belly laughing with my kids is something I can’t get enough of!